Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Evil with meat

A date.

I've known this fella, who we'll call Mac, for quite a while. Until recently though, we were merely aquaintances, notwithstanding the fact that we engaged in some heavy petting, 50's style, the first day we met. But that was a long time ago...I was about 16 I guess. Anyway, a coupla weeks ago, I ran into him at a friend of a friend of a friend's house.

We talked. Since the last time I saw him, he'd gone and graduated. Currently working on a masters in something or other. Assuredly swung his arm around my shoulders as we sat on the floor of the friend of a friend of a friend leaning against the couch. Quoted Pablo Neruda (famous Mexican poet)...a total line, but it totally worked. Said he cooked a mean stir fry and would I like to come over to his place for some sometime? I thrilled him with the heroic tale of how I've managed to completely avoid stir fry in my 20 years of existence. And a "sure."

Numbers exchanged.

After 2 days, he called. The next day he called again. And three days after THAT he called again. We didn't really have a whole lot to talk about, but that's mostly due to the fact that I'm not much of a phone person. The exciting conclusion??? He re-invited me over for that world-famous stir fry. I declined on the grounds that for all I knew, he could be a total creep. No way was I going to his apartment alone. So we decided to go out instead.

BUT WAIT! That's not the exciting conclusion!

The real exciting conclusion came after we played pool. After dinner. After coffee. After we talked about all kinds of relevant, interesting things. After we took stupid pictures on his camera phone. After I went to his place afterall. After I met his roomie. After I played with his adorable dog. After 2 and a half beers. After we watched a movie. Well, in the middle of the movie actually. But definetely after the sloppy half-assed kissing.

Yes friends, the true exciting conclusion to the evening came when dear, interesting, relevant, intelligent Mac engaged in some...shall we say...inappropriate behavior/placing of hands.

The 2 people that I told busted out the big ADR, but I prefer inappropriate behavior/placing of hands. And I'm not one to belittle such things. As a former friend pointed out, I flourish in sadness. Not true, but still...